I didn't go on four walks this week as I had planned. Using my hands felt more important than using my feet. I didn't stick to my eating plan because going out with loved ones was more important than eating at home. I did accomplish a lot of work, some editing of my book, and a little food prep. I purchased a few things on Amazon to make my recovery easier. And I prayed. I prayed a lot. Last night when I got into bed and thought "tomorrow is my surgery," I was filled with more excitement than anxiety. Until I tried to pull up my covers with my right arm. The over-the-top pain reminded me of one more thing I won't be able to do after my thumb surgery because my right arm isn't healed.
Discouragement flooded my heart, but I wouldn't allow it to enter my mind. I reminded myself of the truth. My family is understanding and supportive. I'm not alone. All I have to do is ask for help. It's only a season. In God's timing, I'll be completely healed.
"God, You will heal me completely?" I asked rather than stated when I open up my Bible app to Psalm 27.
I love it when God's word is like a whisper to my heart. I love the He understands even though I don't want to be anxious and discouraged, sometimes I am. Funny that these verses contained two words that have been in my mind for two weeks.
When I became anxious about finishing my book before my surgery, I felt like the Holy Spirit whispered "Be patient." My goal was to completely finish my revisions before October 30. Then the question came to me. What is more important-- achieving my goal and publishing the book this year or creating a book that's truly amazing? Another question followed. Are you trying to please God or man? That hit me hard. What pleases God is a story that glorifies Him on every level. He doesn't care about the timeline. He cares about quality.
The final book in the Once Lost series will be published in 2021. And with every word I edit I pray it will be the best yet. I will be diligent when I've healed to work hard and do my part. I'm certain God will do His.
So, I enter this day with courage in my heart, confident that I will see God's goodness in my life because I will wait patiently on the Lord.